Ukemi

The Greatest Pushup Ever*

2010-03-02T23:03:00.000-08:00

Essentially on the upstroke push up off the heel of your hands until your on your fingertips (75-90 degree angle between fingertips and ground). Works forearm flexors reaaaallly well. Can be used in most of the pushup variations too!

*Possible hyperbole.

Sitrep

2010-02-20T19:06:00.000-08:00

The last few months have been all over the shop really.

Spent the rest of my summer looking after mum and did a couple of army courses. Met some good guys (and some amazing NCOs), and spent a goodly amount of taxpayers money on pyrotechnics. Got paid for it too.

Since then its been a bit chaotic - I've moved out into an apartment so this is the first time I've actually had to look after everything myself - its been a good learning experience but we've only just begun to settle down into a routine and so the past few weeks have been fairly chaotic. Getting the internet connected was a pain in the ass - ended up costing me $220 more than it should have and I needed to dig round in the MDF with a screwdriver myself to get it working. Learned a lot about how the phone systems work though, so it was worthwhile. The money thing has ceased to bother me (though it did at the time), especially since whatever I am earning now is pittance compared to what my starting salary will be when I graduate.

On the subject of phones, I picked myself up an iPhone to replace my old nokia. It's a great bit of kit when jailbroken - the lack of internet for the first month in the house was less of a problem than expected as I could use the phone (though my computer rejected internet tethering, which was a pain) to write documents, save them and attach them to email, etc. Very handy for various hospital related things. Being in Australia, and on 3, I ended up logging up some roaming data charges. Plenty of stories about the how and why of this over the rest of the internet (try whirlpool if you're interested), but long story short is I am trying my hand at C++ to try and write an automatic APN changer. Currently using DragonfireSDK, which is mostly designed for games and so am thinking of having a go at building a hackintosh and using the official SDK. It's been a long while since I've done anything like this, and it's interesting at least... although my coding skillz are understandably rusty.

Most of my time has been taken up with hospitals. Been logging anywhere from 6 to 12 hour days so far, averaging about 8-9 hours. This isn't a bad thing - I'm learning loads and enjoying myself immensely (this is going to be my career. I have found my muse.), but it has meant that on top of sleep, feeding and cleaning myself not much else has been going on. Exercise has been squeezed in wherever it can - I've taken to running to hospital each day - 80% of the time with the weight vest. With a camelback with water, lunch and clothes in it I'm running about 5k a day with between 5-6 or 15-16 kgs extra, and running each 2.5k block in about 10-19 minutes. What I can say is I ran a BFA recently in my fivefingers (new leather FiveFinger TrekKSOs have the Ukemi seal of approval. I cannot more highly recommend a piece of footwear. If I could go through surgery to make my feet into them, I would do it) and 10kg weight vest in 10:24. Which meant I beat 5/6 members of my section (to be fair, they are pretty unfit. Still, a bit embarrasing for them :P). In general though, I have found my running times to have been pretty erratic, so I'm planning on getting myself a nike+ipod pedometer to help me track such things and try and better push myself.

Which neatly segues me into the next and most common topic to grace this blog - exercise. The running (more than I have ever regularly done before) has been great, but my traditional domains of strength and power have been untrained (though maintained and possibly improved through my 10-minute alarm) My spirit has suffered a bit from this, but not as much as one might expect. I have a bullheaded nature, and as I have developed intellectually over the past few years it has expressed itself in an intellectual manner. So whilst my body has been maintained through some army courses and some exercise, and my intellect worked through study of the human body (it is so fascinating), my spiritual training has been somewhat unfocused. I think it has been there - I spent two months looking after broken family members and study brings it's own kind of mental strength... But it remains that there hasn't been a situation where I have been balls-to-the-wall working in quite some time, where I am in pain enough that I stop feeling it, exhausted enough that I go deaf, sweating enough that my eyes burn, and where the only thing pushing me onwards is my own self-discipline. So I feel as if I've gone a little soft of late.

So.

Found a building over the road I can exercise on. Going to write a few small workouts for it. Simple, cross-fit style ones that can be done in 15-20 minutes. I'm sure I waste more time than that a day right now.

Going to do my weekly runs and time them. Try to get them down to a pre-SF selection standard, yet with the weight vest.

Going to smash this year academically. Pulled a very-near HD average for the past two years.

We'll see how it goes.

23 November '09

2009-11-24T02:02:00.000-08:00

My Dad died yesterday. First time I've cried in seven years.

Hard as nails, heavy as lead.
Rest now Richard the Lionheart.
In the end, Nature was merciful.

There is a lot more there, but it's mine.

Data point

2009-11-07T23:54:00.000-08:00

In preparation for the job - going out and dealing with actual people - part of medical training involves interviews with simulated patients. One of these turned up recently with the presenting complaint of tiredness, and you had five minutes or so to write down anything you felt pertinent before going in and doing the interview.

Me being me approached it thusly - a relatively difficult stem (at this stage in training) would be accompanied with an easy diagnosis (A modus operandi D&D players will know as metagaming. Not realistic, but these exams are flawed in more ways than one anyway). So I wrote down 3 differentials - hypothyroid, anaemia and diabetes, a few probing questions for each and upon entering had enough evidence to call the correct diagnosis in about 30 seconds.

In, out, answer, win. But not really. It's a character flaw of mine that means I often think very haphazardly, racing through to the end to finish more quickly at the expense of thoroughness. 9/10 times it makes no difference.

Still isn't good enough though. Neither would 99/100 or 999/1000.

It is going to take quite a shift in direction to relearn not so much a greater attention to detail (though that is important), but more different method of approaching the same situation.

What I should have done is taken the presenting complaint - tiredness - and worked from the ground up. Pathology in what systems can produce tiredness - CVS, Resp, GIT, Haemopoietic, Endocrine, Psychological (depression), etc; take a systems review of those.

As a very wise person once told me: The diagnosis is the end, not the beginning. Do the process right, and the diagnosis will fall out.

Start at the start. I have some unlearning to do.

The fuck.

2009-10-28T01:03:00.001-07:00

www.gymjones.com

These guys are inspiration.

By the power of physics

2009-10-10T23:10:00.001-07:00

Yesterday out training I had managed to get a cat to the level where I was happy with it and prepared to move up. So, grabbed a bench and decided to add that on top.

It was fucking heavy. About 5x1.5x1.5 ft of solid wood. I couldn't get it up by myself. So I dragged another bench over. Bit of lever action later and I had this second bench sitting where I wanted it.

As I arrived to start training today, couple of guys on their way back from the gym were walking past. One of them went over to it and lifted it up a little.

"Yeah. Would have taken a group of guys to get this up."

- - -

Haven't got that jump yet. I know I can cat the height (theres a nipple high box that I can get on to, I was actually hoping this jump would help me train to clear that one). In general though my cats are still quite temperamental, sometimes feeling technically excellent and sometimes I can't even get through to visualising the technique. Weird.

Got cat-pops today though. That was nice.

More lessons

2009-10-06T23:53:00.001-07:00

Spent the past couple of weeks trying to get some parkour in everyday. Seems to help a lot better than the once or twice a week I've been doing so far, the continual reinforcement helps. Started following my 10-minute room timer a bit more rigorously too and hence I'm sorer than I've been since my gym membership expired.

On Monday I had managed after a few tries to pull off a wallrun in my five fingers which I wasn't able to get in my 5-10s. After a rather poor session today I decided to go back to it and improve on it. Took me a long time to get it again. Maybe 30 tries. Got pretty dissapointed early in the process, but my technique improved a lot in the interim - lesson: even the failures are useful. The step became a lot more solid and I walked up a lot easier each time. The try on which I actually got it I was tired (and a little angry, which might've helped), but still got a solid hand to it (the grip is difficult because its slippery metal, requires a bit of contact or a dyno up to the next handhold. I'll work on the two-hands to the wall next, and then to the dyno I think.) and clambered up.

Best part about that wallrun was the landings though. A lot of drops onto concrete in five fingers and no pain whatsoever. Landing technique is improving.

God.

2009-09-11T18:23:00.000-07:00

Fairly controversial title that.

A few experiences and discussions with some of my more theistic friends led me to stumble upon the following real/rational-isation. The only analogy I can think of describe it is part of chaos theory, which pretty much defeats the purpose of making it easier to understand, but the actual thought is pretty easy to get a handle on anyway. Still, onward with the analogy.

From the wikipedia entry: "Chaos theory is a branch of mathematics which studies the behavior of certain dynamic systems that may be highly sensitive to initial conditions." Normally called the butterfly effect, small changes = large effects.

This leads to a principle - if you have a large number of end behaviours and don't comprehend the underlying formula, the behaviour is random. If you know the formula (and the initial conditions), the behaviours aren't random. This is the 'God moves in mysterious ways' argument.

- - -

In ages past, all natural phenomena were explained by being due to various Gods. As science offered a natural explanation of them, the domain of God was reduced. I don't see them as being exclusive. My concept of God is one that is synonymous with the concepts of natural law. God is everything, and therefore the interactions between everything - from this come omniscience and omnipotence - this is the theistic argument. Humans, some other primates and dolphins all have a consciousness (self-awareness here) contained within a few cubic inches. The universe itself has a consciousness of sorts in its cyclical nature; from the simple things like day/night which can be accurately predicted to the minute, to the complicated ones weather which we struggle to predict even a few days in advance.

I do not say that this universe is aligned with a particular moral compass. It is aligned with a force of a kind though, an incomprehensible arrangement of natural laws which would take another universes worth of computers to predict, though ultimately I think is a structured place - and I have no qualms about calling that force God.

NB: This doesn't leave much wiggle room for me on the subject of a soul. I don't know about it: most times I am a determinist, but occasionally when I am a little more conscious I feel there is a little piece of will - part of self but not of self - like being comfortably at home in another country - struggling to push a domino one way or the other inside my head, interrupting or assisting the chain already in place. I haven't had enough experience to call it though.

5 days

2009-09-04T23:14:00.000-07:00

Sat in on 8 surgeries this week with a somewhat... cavalier surgeon who let me take the knife and do the cutting on three of them - after I had demonstrated enough anatomical knowledge to know what to avoid. Excised 3 BCC/SCCs (types of skin cancer for you non-medical types) and did the suturing on the last one, as well as some stitches elsewhere. He said my cutting was good ("perfect", actually, though I think that means I just came through the right layers in the right places), though my suturing needs work - if the stitches are placed unevenly on each side then one ends up shorter than the other and the wound doesn't close well, and that can mean infection. Need to go back to the cadavers to work on my stitching, methinks. It's amazing the differences between living and dead bodies like the strength/turgor of the skin; and even between different living bodies, how some head wounds bleed torrentially and others not at all.

Finally signed my transfer papers to the infantry. Hopefully looking at the November-December IETs, and maybe some advanced courses later in summer if all goes my way. Which it probably won't. But resting will be good for me anyway.

Had the best training session since my Canberra trip about 2 months ago. Turn vaults at speed are wikkid fun!

Following my Canberra trip I had more money than I expected left over, noticed that I needed more power, and wanted to keep working on my strength as my gym membership was about to lapse. I jumped on the website of Australian Kettlebells (apparently they have an actual store/gym in for you Melbournites) and bought me a weight vest and agility bands. A mate was having a play with them whilst I was having a light training session in a tree - he had looped it round a pole and was running towards a drink bottle. A play session turned very, very intense and soon we were running and swearing and digging our fingers into the gaps between slabs to get a hold and let us keep moving. Once we hit that, we switched and moved it further away. For the last round, we decided every failure would mean the bottle was moved an inch further. My first attempt was going well, I was about 10cm out of reach and attempted to leap towards the bottle only to have the band snap off my waist, hook round my ankles and drag me ignominiously along the concrete back to the pole. Right before attempt No. 2 I had a little zen moment - I was going to run, then swear and slap that bottle down. I ran, and with a mighty "You cunt!" - smote that bottle upon the concrete.

Lessons

2009-07-15T22:37:00.000-07:00

Wow. Long time no posts. To sum up - I've been doing more work in trees and outdoors - haven't been to the gym in quite a while - the beep tests evolved into a 4-5k run 6/7 which is considerably less boring. More regular parkour training has been much more enjoyable and I have been progressing at a snails pace - but still progressing. In all, various things have been happening - exams and training, none of it really worth writing on; and no workouts to share as they haven't been planned or recorded.

Spent this past week in Canberra training with Eliot. It was a solid five days - more solid than NatSoc last year even though the days were shorter- probably because it was just us and sometimes a few locals, so there was more training and less sitting around socialising.

It was a good holiday though - learnt some things and thought I'd share. Though most of them are personal so I'm not sure how much good it will do you :P.

My problems are still largely mental blocks. Mental blocks of the illogical kind since the pain isn't really a major concern of mine and serious damage is rare. Talking with Eliot about it all he said two things - one of which I had realised already but not enough to articulate and another one I don't think I'd considered.

Drilling. A lot of the fundamentals I can do and do well (or at least passably), but not instinctively. This creates some breaks in flow when trying to string a bunch of movements quickly together and causes me to glitch when approaching new/different obstacles. I had figured this would disappear with general training, but E pointed out drilling which makes a lot more sense in terms of getting comfortable specific movements - especially things like cats which can be pretty varied depending on obstacle size/type/approach/exit (to precision or arm).
Learning to fail. A lot of the mental blocks I think may stem from the 'what ifs'... If I clip here, what will happen? If I don't make the jump, what will I do? Eliot mentioned that a lot of the better Sydney traceurs (Rhys/Antek/Sammy etc) practiced their bails and breakfalls, how to slide down walls they fail to precision/arm and land well from poor angles. Pays off double - not only because when accidents happen you can turn them around, but also being confident that you can means you attempt things you otherwise might not - and often succeed them, as tends to happen.

One other thing I noticed lacking was my precision strength, and to a lesser degree balance. This makes some sense considering my history, in the gym I (and most people I think) are more inclined to work upper body, and considering most of my leg work is long distance running, my legs are relatively weak in the power and strength areas. This limits jumping distance (especially considering my above average bodyweight) and I think to some extent coordination... as I don't imagine endurance work assists development of fine motor control as much as strength and power.

On a completely unrelated note - I learnt a couple of ways to euthanise animals. I asked my folks how to do it properly- both of whom have done a lot of it in their time - after I recently killed a roo by bludgeoning it on the back of the head after it was hit by a car. Summary:

Crushing the skull is probably the best for the animal - if its on the road and still alive carefully running over its head is probably the most humane.
Next most humane is breaking its neck - though this is exceedingly difficult to do on anything much larger than a rabbit simply due to the amount of force required.
NB: This one I found interesting. A lot of media treats the neck as a rather fragile structure (which it is compared to the stresses that you hear about breaking it - falls and the like. Consider an 80kg man falling from a height of ONE meter generates 784N of force. I did a brief lit search for the amount of newtons generated by skeletal muscle (a broad question if there ever was one) which turned up nothing; but logically I would assume since the same amount of force needs to be generated by the body to raise the centre of gravity 1m - an amount of force generated by the entire body working in unison. Trying to generate the same amount of force by a small muscle group in your upper back special-forces-movie style seems surely difficult. Caveat: Most people can probably jump higher than 1m. I would imagine that most (direct, rather than subsequent infection) deaths from falling also occur from distances higher than 1m. Regardless of the physics, Dad said he struggled with anything larger than a ferret.

Next come the two more common (at least in media):

Cutting its throat. Most humane in a laboratory setting (i.e. killing lab animals...though I believe they are killed by injection these days. Not likely you'll have your hands on those substances, anyway.), though my father always used to carry a carving knife with him for roadkill until he was pulled over by the police one day. Method: Grip the base of the mandible tightly and fully extend the neck. Feel for the lateral masses of the atlas (deep and inferior to the mastoid processes), and cut from above tracheal cartilage back to the lateral masses. By fully extending the neck you allow the blade to pass above the body of C1 and sever the cord, which stops the pain of bleeding out. Violence of action is very important, as quicker movements will cause less pain.
Stun/Bolt gun. Method is to place the gun on the skull and fire the piston in - ideally penetrating enough of the frontal cortex to kill the animal instantly. However, if the gun isn't fully in contact or the animal moves its head the pistol can recoil, only wounding the animal.

NB: Again, differs from the common media representation here. Perhaps since cutting its throat is seemingly more violent its also more frowned upon, though Dad favoured it, either because he felt it was more controlled or because he is of the old school. Also mentioned was that the biggest variable is the skill of the butcher rather than the method.

Lastly - some inspiration: +Barnz 08-09 and Trace Elements Melbourne 2008 videos. Watch, and be amazed.

1:28.4

2009-05-20T04:12:00.000-07:00

Is my new 500m ergo sprint PB.

Happy with that considering I've been sedentary for the past 3 weeks after an AC injury, tired, dehydrated and sick after the last army weekend. Also done at the end of a gym session, after muscle ups and one-legged deadlifts @60kgs.

Feeling like I want to break 1:22 on a row.
Kicking around the idea of getting a part-time job as a personal trainer.
Started running the beep test daily, as whilst at uni I don't run and think it may be holding me back some.
Started gymnastics more frequently and slowly getting some saults down.
Still not sure what I'm chasing parkour-wise. Enjoying it immensly when I train, but training is still pretty unscheduled and uncommon.

Peace.

Flight of Ideas

2009-04-17T00:55:00.000-07:00

Life has been very good lately. Due to exams and assignments and the like I havn't been getting as much physical stuff as I want to done lately, which while sad on its own I guess, has been buffered by the amount of stuff that I have been learning. Second year is more intense, but infinitely more interesting, especially as you start to head into the next level of detail. Principles are beginning to become more important which suits me fine - rote learning is something I have always had a problem with, but my reasoning is starting to come more into play - which has provided a happy boost to my self-esteem as I begin to realise, 'Hey, I could actually be good at this.'

Heard a nice story too about an emergency registrar who had a patient present completly blue after being hit by a car on his left side. The registrat worked out it was a flail chest and grabbed the nearets object (a pillow), pushed it into the flail segment which immobilised it, and allowed him to ventilate on his right lung. Very cool.

Training has been different of late. I've been doing weighted muscle ups lately (locally known as man-ups), by best 1RM so far being with a 20kg dumbbell between my feet. Still struggling to get a consistent muscle up on rings however, I think due to technique being largely 'pull hard and hope for the best.' I've also taken to climbing trees, which has helped my upper body strength immensly as my arms have to work at all the odd, natural angles one dosn't find in the more inorganic gym. I'm beginning to find I train parkour more often now too, and also more spontaneously, and I've decided when my gym membership runs out in June/July, I'll make the call as to whether I want to renew it, or move all my training outdoors. We shall see.

But yes, life is good.

Yesterday

2009-04-03T01:50:00.000-07:00

Randomly pulled a 1:28:8 500m ergo sprint.

Knew the answer to all bar ~3 questions in a CVS tute.
(NB: I know the difference between 'knowing' and someone saying the answer and going 'I knew that'.)

Progress has been made.

March 26th

2009-03-25T21:49:00.000-07:00

Did a workout I saw on GymJones, which they took from CrossFit (150 squats, run 800m, 150 squts). I was originally planning to do a 50kg, 45kg, 40kg progression, but I forgot to add the bar, and then forgot that 2x10kgs is 20 kgs. Sets broken down as follows:

2x 25 squats @ 70kgs
2x 25 squats @ 55kgs
2x 25 squats @ 50kgs

Run 1000m

15 squats @ 70kgs
10 squats @ 70kgs
15 squats @ 70kgs
10 squats @ 70kgs

20 squats @ 55kgs
20 squats @ 55kgs
10 squats @ 55kgs

20 squats @ 50kgs
20 squats @ 50kgs
10 squats @ 50kgs

End result; my legs are shaking.

Still not dead

2009-03-09T15:05:00.000-07:00

- Did the overland. It was a beautiful trip, though physically piss. Kicking around the idea of doing it with eliot in winter.
- Back at uni, back at the gym. Still trying to find a nice goal to work for (my workout buddies are tough but don't have any specific goals of their own), right now a planche and iron cross are the main ones, and I'm a fair way from both. Uni is sweet, second year kicks ass. Feel like I've learnt more in the past week than in the past year... Maybe I just forgot everything I learnt last year :).
- Have started stretching. Seen a *little* bit of improvement over the past week or so, which is very comforting. Beginning to enjoy doing it too.
- Set up a 10 minute timer on my computer which starts and resets itself automatically. On the alarm I do a set of something. Nice way to keep active.
- Didn't celebrate my 3rd birthday (was out bush). Februrary 14th or 16th - I've tried and I can't remember which. Felt kind of sad... sometimes I look at all the stuff I can't do and realise how far I havn't come. This is tempered by the thoughts that I havn't dedicated myself to being solely physical, it has been the smaller part of my life. Mostly though I think I have good friends, good food, good challenges... it makes the details matter less.

Good times.

2009-01-17T18:50:00.000-08:00

I've been away from the keyboard for a bit, I realise. Working on my driving, revising the things I did poorly on in my exams and recovering those lost scraps of knowledge from ages past to try to rebuild my melted desktop has been taking up most of my time.

Before all that though I was up at Kapooka, doing the reservist entry course and enjoying myself immensly. 'Kapooka Survival Guides' had been floating around my unit before then, and from what I gathered from those at my unit, I had expected it to be pretty tough. My assumption was that it would be physically draining - long, heavy pack marches with sleep deprivation and the like. In reality though; physically it was piss - most of us left less fit than when we arrived, but the attitude the staff take was something I think noone there had experience before, one which a few of us fell in step with in the first few days, and others never got to grips with. If you're looking at spending time up at Home of the Soldier, my advice is this: Disregard all your thoughts about proportionality. If you fuck up, they're going to yell at you. A lot. Learn from it and get over it, because they certainly will. The staff there are in the buisiness of training soliders - they are not (necessarily) bad people, they have just found that sadism works as an effective blunt instrument with which to train the rabble who come in. Kapooka is not hard (if you need proof, just look at some of those you've see march out) - but it is different, and you need to be prepared to change. Just enjoy it.

What I felt I got most out of my stay there was a greater understanding of teamwork. Working in a team does not involve each person giving equally to the team. It involves devoting oneself totally to the goal of the group and the welfare of those within that group above yourself, something I had never considered until then.

What follows are some of the memorable moments of my time at 1 RTB:

* * *

Getting off the bus in silence, the corporals telling us to take our bags in our left hands and enter the entry hall. Watching half the cohort take pick up their bags with their right hand and walk off. Then waiting in the entry hall for the platoon commander, the platoon staff lined up like statues - motionless - with identical thousand-yard stares.

* * *

Belaying the last person at the abseiling wall, who came rocketing down barely touching the wall.
"Slow down man, only a couple of meters to go."
He landed, turned around and looked up at me incredulously.
"Who the fuck are you calling man?"
"... Corporal, sorry."

* * *

Looking up at one of the corporals, and recieving one of the most vicious greasy's back. Then, later, going to him for help... "No no, you do it like this mate. Fuck, sorry - recruit."

* * *

"What the fuck are you doing with that machine gun?! No machine gun's tonight!"

* * *

"So, you do medicine do you?"
"Yes corporal."
"Are you a nerd then? I fucking hate nerds!"
"That's a little prejudice corporal."

* * *

"Our submarine, as some of you may have noticed, is taking on water. The only way to stop this water leak is to polish our brass. We must also be completely silent, to avoid being depth-charged."

* * *

"Get away from the slut's rooms ya sex offender!"

* * *

At the range, cleaning our weapons after a shoot.
"Man, did any of you guys ever play pokemon? That shit was awesome."
"What about Zelda? They were pretty much the best games ever made."
"Yeah man! Zelda was the shit!"

* * *

In the lines, a mate of mine left the room to fill out the medical restrictions logbook for when his pills would run out. The platoon sergeant walked through the foyer and told him to piss off, so he quickly did the addition and ran off. He came back and said, "Man, I think I fucked up my med book."
Later; the sergeant came around handing out admin.
"Ah, Recruit C! How many days are there in November, recruit C?"
"30, Sergeant."
"So why the fuck did you say your meds ran out on the 32nd of November?"

* * *

Our platoon commander, warning us of booby traps laid by guerillas in the local area. The next day, patrolling and watching the section ahead disappear under a cloud of smoke. They missed one.

* * *

Being the last ones to leave before Christmas, we had the place to ourselves on the last day. Squaregaited everywhere.

* * *
There were many more, but most of them are in-jokes. Good times.

The Den

2008-10-22T02:34:00.000-07:00

Finally got an expandable chinup bar that doesn't need any screws. My rings are now hanging in my doorway and they are awesome.

Ring L-sits are hard.

What is wrong with gym franchises.

2008-10-21T05:07:00.000-07:00

I was doing skin the cats on a chinup bar (even having one is a pretty impressive accomplishment for a 'modern' gym), and got a good talking to from one of the personal trainer's there, who none to kindly asked me to either leave or move to the bank of shoulder machines. Call me shallow, but I don't like being told how to exercise by a person with a muffin top breaking out over her athletic pants.

Later, I saw the gym board - where each trainer at the gym had posted a little biography. Each came equipped with a quote - "Go hard or Go home", and the like. Hers was "Those who don't have personal goals will always be working for those who do."

The irony nearly killed me.

The State of the System

2008-10-18T00:24:00.000-07:00

Have a new set of workout goals. A little more achievable than the last few I guess. Most are half-way steps that I probably could have used when I wrote clarity at the start of the year.

- Set of 10 'proper' muscle ups.
- Full pistol each leg
- Handstand press
- Advanced tuck planche for 60 seconds
- Freestanding HSPUs
- Flag

All of these I see as pretty easily achieveable. I understand the mechanics behind each as much as I can. Some of them (like the muscle ups & adv. tuck planche) are just drilling; the others I think are mostly technical exercises and will just require persistent experimentation to nugget out. Theres also a fair bit of cross-over between the last four, so that will also assist.

And a couple of big ones:
- OAC
- Iron Cross

It feels a little weird just writing those last two down. Definitly possible, definitly hard. I'm not sure if I want to set a timeframe on either just yet.

In other news, Uni has finished, and after my exams I'll be heading to Kapooka for Army basic training.

Train hard.

October 15th

2008-10-14T23:52:00.000-07:00

Did September 4th today with A & T, did the second ergo in 1:30.4, which is a new PB set at a new level of physical exhaustion. I think I was over pain at that point. Only broke on the last backwards quadrupedal (we went down then up, rather than up then down), my shoulders just gave out and I didn't want to faceplant on concrete... I finished it - however poorly - in the end.

October 8th

2008-10-08T02:19:00.000-07:00

Did a workout with A today. Each round had two exercises, and you alternate without breaks (whoever finishes first gets a rest).

Round 1:
Romanian chair/bench press x10 each arm @ 30lbs
Pushups x10

Round 2:
Thrusters x10 @ ~27kgs
Box jumps x 15 @ ~30"

Round 3:
Burpee chins x 10
Rest

Round 4:
Floor wipers x 15 @ 50kgs
Deadlifts x 10 @ 80kgs

Round 5:
Turkish get up x 5 @11/15kgs
Rest

NB: Had a bit of a competition in round 3. First time I did burpee muscle-up combo. Then A did clapping PUs. Then I did 1-leg clapping PUs. Then A did one-hand pushups. Then I did clapping PUs and clapping chins.

This workout hurt a lot more than it looks like. Possibly because I still havn't fully recovered from NatSock, or the 100 pistols I did on Monday. Or the pushups I've started throwing out randomly during the day....

October 6th

2008-10-06T04:34:00.000-07:00

The original intent was to go to the pool for an hour, train for an hour, and gym for an hour from 7-10. A haircut cut this short (pun absolutely intended...), so I ended up swimming from about 7:20-8:00. Parkour training was good, I worked up my right handed speeds nicely (a technique I've historically had trouble with), did some wallruns and precisions, some underbars and cats. Mostly I was just exploring the university as this is the first time I've actually examined the campus properly, and I found a lot of good spots. I've spotted some options for diving cats and cat-to-precisions, pretty much everything except arm jumps (minus one or two big ones) and decent precisons which is coincidently what I think are my weakest movements. I'm sure more options will present themselves as I explore, and also begin to pick out precisions and arm jumps in the environment. I arrived at the gym a little late and did the following workout, which was not what I had intended, but I was still happy with it considering the previous sessions and the preceding week.

Rope x 2
25 xPistols each leg
2:30 Wall sit
25 Pistols each leg
30x Wall sit
25x Burpee chin combo
15x Climb ups from arm jump position to support
10m shimmy in support position
4x Tabata sprints
15x Climb ups from arm jump position to support
10m shimmy in support position
4x Tabata sprints

The intended workout, and probably much more effective, was:
25x Climb ups from arm jump position to support
10m shimmy in support position
4x Tabata sprints
Rope
25x Pistols each leg
2:30 Wall sit
25x Burpee chin combo
500m Ergo sprint

Repeat.

Only other notes I have is I feel rather tired, and I hate tabata sprints. Hate them.

Night y'all. Train hard.

Edit: Forgot to mention, I can't do pistols properly. I though it was a calf flexibility issue, although after talking to some people at NatSock theres a possibility it could also be to do with balance. I think I might work towards pistols anyway - just practicing them will address any problems, flexibility, balance, or otherwise. As it was, I did them off a bench, ass to heel on the right leg, and only to thigh-parallel with bench on my left leg, as it wasn't strong enough to do the full rep.

Viva la Vida!

2008-10-05T18:23:00.000-07:00

Well, NatSock is over and I'm beached as. Bro. For those who don't know, NatSock was the 2008 National Jam for parkour in Australia. I realised a few things while I was there, and learned a lot about how parkour should be trained.

The big question came when Chippa asked the group, 'Why do you do parkour?' I didn't really have an answer. I spent much of the downtime for the rest of the week asking myself the question, and I think I have managed to articulate my motivations. I want to be able. Part of this is having the strength, the coordination... but this can be developed from any physical pursuit. The other part, and the part I realise I have neglected entirely is the freedom. By that I mean not just the ability to choose my own path, but also to have the ability to make it work for me. So many options in life are closed by circumstance, and I see so many more closed because people have to live with their bad choices, or worse, the choices that they didn't know they made. Somehow I feel that development here will allow me to transcend this maze of doorways, to find away back from bad choices, across to better ones, and so on. I feel this description is constrained by the analogy, but it works for me now. No doubt as I develop as an athelete it will become clearer.

The next realisation was much more bitter. I suck real hard at parkour. Case in point: A tiny, five-and-a-half foot precision to a rock in a water feature. Two (nearly three now) years ago when I emerged from the womb, I had a rather natural, though accentuated, fear of pain. This was my main motivation to not do things. Two years of chasing the burn has eroded this I think, I remember about a month ago I got punched in the balls and just roared. There was a dull pain then, but thoughts about that were mostly surpassed by the predatory desire to get my hands around the other guy's throat. My fear now, I think, is of failing. Partly, perhaps, the stresses of year 12 pushing me altered my perceptions. Mostly I think, it would be falling short of my expectations, breaking the perception of self that I've forged over past couple of years, and which - through my attitude and what I say - I generally present to others. I value integrity and honesty very highly, so the thought of having lied to myself and others about who I am is a very ugly, distastful feeling for me. Hence, I may try to avoid damaging this story by not doing things too far out of this comfort zone. One thing I noticed was in the case of things such as this, where there is a very obvious, defined failure point (falling in the pond), I'd prefer to do it alone so I avoid any embarrasment.

NB: I'm not particularly proud of this answer. I do feel it is honest, and should be written down.

To work past this fear, I think I just need to be come comfortable with the idea of failure as a learning experience, rather than the more apocalyptic connotations that I currently have for it.

The last question was my reason for attending in the first place. For a while, I have been wondering how to train parkour properly. When I dabbled a few years back, I had no idea and no physical ability. Progress, needless to say, was slow. This year, I had begun the dabbling again. With physical ability, progress has been bordering on acceptable. Watching the instructors train, a privelege I have never had before, I understand why. The two who I watched the most, and whos attitude I found the most inspiring, was Nippon and Cino. They moved constantly and erratically, running, jumping, crawling, vaulting, rolling, etc with no apparent purpose. As one does when one meets their betters, I emptied my cup and copied them. And over this weekend I have progressed more in ability as an athelete than I have at any other time in my life. Fuck it feels good.

It was an amazing week spent with amazing people, and I'm looking forward to doing it again sometime. At the risk of speaking too soon, watch this space. Progression is coming to town.

September 18th

2008-09-18T05:20:00.000-07:00

Did Monday's workout from start to finish. Wasn't that hard in the end, though I was taking it a bit slower than I probably could (and should) have. I pulled 1:32.4 on the ergo again, although this time it seemed to be a lazier effort. My stroke rate hovered about 32 for the first 400m (I was taking it pretty lazily to be honest) and then I realised in the last 100 that I could actually push for a PB, and ended up with a stroke rate of about 38. Yesterdays workout was rather lackluster, but the squatting was good, and I held the first stage of the planche progression for about 63 seconds, which means I move up to the next one.

September 15th

2008-09-15T05:35:00.000-07:00

Muscle ups x 5
Lunge walk ~ 80 m (3 second hold/lunge)
Sprint back
Muscle ups x 4
Man-makers @ 24kgs x 7
Row sprint 500m
Muscle ups x 3
Back quad up stairs
Quad down ramp
Muscle ups x 2
Floor wipers x 50
Headstand (30 secs)
Muscle up x 1

Time: N/A, but DNF

I'd taken last week off as a bit of R&R, so it was good to be back. The workout is a bit of a carbon copy of the last one, with a 5-to-1 muscle ups thrown in. Pity I didn't finish, I piked after the Muscle ups x 3. Probably a combination of bad food over the weekend, and too much food today had me feeling very ill. Good news was I pulled 1:32.4 on the 500m sprint! Very fucking stoked, considering I was hardly fresh (those man-makers were a bitch).

I'm going to have another go at the full one on Thursday. I'm quite a fan of this style of workout, though I think the timed ones force myself to go harder, so I think I might revert to those. (I don't time ones where going slower MAY be beneficial, such as in the lunge walking. I suppose you could do something like for every second extra you hold a lunge, you lose a second on the total time... but if I can concentrate that much during one of these workouts then there is probably something wrong.)

September 4th

2008-09-04T05:02:00.000-07:00

Man-makers @ 20kgs x 6*
Row 500m (Sprint)
Lunge walk ~100 paces
Sprint ~100 paces
Backwards quadrupedal up 2 flights stairs
Forwards quadrupedal down the disabled ramps
Backwards quadrupedal up 2 flights stairs
Forwards quadrupedal down the disabled ramps

Repeat for 2 rounds.

This one I mucked around with a little at the time. Final version is posted here - as I did for the second round. First round I did 50x DB Squat thrusts @ 35lbs each hand instead of the man-makers, but felt this was too shoulder-intensive and not so leg intensive to pair with the ergo. I switched this for man-makers in the second round, and experimented with varying weights. I settled on strength-heavy sets of 6 reps @ 20kgs each hand, which is kinda the opposite of the lunge and quad groups - and *in retrospect I feel that sets of 20 (no break), with a light weight with the man-makers would have been the best option.

The entire workout was an experiment with pairing long endurance/strength sets with sprints (as in the traditional lunge-walk/sprint group I used), and it fucked me right up. Whether this was because I was bugged from yesterdays gym & swim, or because it was hard for me I'm not too sure, but I broke a few times.

I think I'm getting stronger.

I don't go as long as I feel I could, and ofttimes I find energy reserves that by all rights should have been used long before, but I'm also finding that I am getting a little further each time before this happens. And it feels good.

September 1st

2008-09-01T04:17:00.000-07:00

Today was Gym Jones style, but with a Rest Position (tm). What this means is that whenever youI would normally rest, instead you go into a position where you balance on your arse, legs semi-tucked out in front and arms anywhere except wrapped around your legs. Keeps some light tension in your abs and makes it hard to breathe. Lovely. The workout itself was quite quick (finished in 12:58), but quite short compared to some of the others. I was chasing the ab-burn I had yesterday, and made it briefly. Didn't exactly feel like my abs were separating from my peritoneum, but thats probably also a good thing. Might be something for you to try if you have a spare 15 minutes at the bus-stop... and happen to be carrying an olympic bar and plates.

50 x Pushups. The rest position here is a plank.
50 x V-sits. Rest position is Rest Position (tm).
50 x Ankle touches. Rest position is Rest Position (tm).
50 x Deadlifts @ BW. Rest position is Rest Position (tm).

NB:
- V-sits extend all the way down into a backwards superman.
- Ankle touches: Sit up slightly, legs @ 90 degrees and laterally deviate to touch each ankle.
- I couldn't think of a better rest position for deadlifts which wouldn't put much strain on the ligaments of the elbow (esp.) and the rotator cuff, which is why its a little odd.
- It was pretty hard to even hold a rest position in the middle two sets. I broke a few times and grabbed my legs.

August 28th

2008-08-28T04:33:00.000-07:00

Man-makers x 25 (@ 12kgs)
Floor wipers x 50
Clapping chins x 20
Dips x 20
Man-makers x 25 (@ 12kgs)
DB Bear crawl ~60m (@ 10kgs)
Unsupported DB Bench press x 15 each arm (@ 15kgs)
Man-makers x 25 (@ 12kgs)

Time: 52:35

In retrospect that doesn't look that hard. Especially considering the time I took, it seems pretty weak.

August 25th

2008-08-25T04:48:00.000-07:00

10 x Muscle ups
50 x Deadlifts @ BW
20 x Skin the Cats
50 x Box jumps @ 30"
30 x Unsupported DB Bench press (chest off bench) (25 each arm) (I did ~15kgs)
50 x Squats @ 3/4 BW
40 x Knees to elbows
50 x Lunges @ 44kgs
50 x Burpees

Time: 1:07:54

"300." Kinda.

2008-08-21T04:02:00.001-07:00

Did the 300 workout tonight. Time; 26:50.

“300”
25x Pull-up +
50x Deadlift @ 135# +
50x Push-up +
50x Box Jump @ 24” box +
50x Floor Wiper @ 135# (one-count) +
50x KB Clean and Press @ 36# (KB must touch floor between reps) +
25x Pull-up
300 reps total

I made a few changes though:
- Because the imperial system is ridiculous and we don't count in pound weights, I used 60kgs instead of 135 pounds (60 kgs ~= 132.3 lbs)

- Again, due to equipment, the box I used was about 30" high, rather than 24".

- I could only manage eight reps of the floor wiper before my arms gave way with the bar on top. Following this, I finished the set with just the bar (20kgs, ~= 44lbs)

- Similarly, I used a 16kg dumbbell for the KB press instead of a 36lb kettleball (16kgs ~=35.3lbs) because I don't have access to kettleballs.

It was a pretty tough gig. By the time I got to the box jumps I was struggling to keep my dinner(s) down. The last set of pullups took about 4 minutes, alternating between screaming out the remaining reps and keeping the puke back behind my teeth. I'm a little disappointed about how the floor wipers went, but in my defense (i.e., my excuse) I'd been greasing the groove with HSPUs and planches all day, and my shoulders were still hurting from the night before (Waaaaghhh...). All in all though, pretty happy with the effort. Could have gone faster though. I'll do it again in a few months and see how I've grown.

Dominoes

2008-08-10T05:23:00.000-07:00

I had a moment of insight this morning, precipitated by a phrase I read in Chiron's book*; "Whatever you are feeling IS NORMAL!" I'm taking it well out of context and my train of thought isn't finished yet, but here is how it goes.

Generally, when I feel a bad emotion (loneliness, anger, anxiety), I feel bad that I felt it...because I feel they are somehow below me - or not part of the person who I see myself becoming** . If we take this 'bad' emotion, define it as 'normal' - it is no longer 'bad' (in my sense of the word)... and then redundant. A loose analogy is learning to meditate, where one acknowledges a distraction when one occurs, but does not give it attention. By dismissing the bad emotion as a natural disturbance, it no longer bothered me at all.

*Picked up a few books this week. Meditations was one; I read it first and it was excellent. I'm not big on MA books but Rory deals with a lot of issues very well. It stimulates non-martial trains of thought too, and though a lot of this stuff is already available on his blog, theres enough there to make it worth the money.

I'm now making my way through Kiss or Kill: Confessions of a Serial Climber, then afterwards I'll tackle Deep Survival, finish off with Verbal Judo and then Manwatching (once it arrives). Also planning to pick up a copy of Walden this week. At some point in the next month or so I'm going to sit down and discuss how I'm developing as an athlete and as a human being, and make some plans/goals for the future.

**Or wanting to become...who I am may be quite different to my expectations, though I think my insight is pretty good.

Train hard.

Review

2008-08-04T05:11:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since my last evaluation, so here goes.

Total Body Water: 64.1%
- Less than last time. I have been rather dehydrated of late, having just returned from a rural clinical rotation where my main diet consisted of Johnny Walker and goon. I've also picked up a cold, which may have something to do with it. All things considered though, I think this is really good.

Daily Dietary Requirement: 9353 kJ
- Much more than last time. Its also worth mentioning here that I've put 4-5 kgs since last time. While a portion of that is going to be fat, especially since my body fat percentage has gone up, there is still a lot of muscle in there, which is going to need fuel. Since this is at rest, I imagine that it increases proportionally under load...which would explain the colossal amount of food I eat now.

Metabolic Age: 12
- Still young at heart

Body fat percentage: 7.9%
- An extra 1.2% bodyfat. I was aiming to stack on fat before my prom trip as an extra energy supply, but I'm still unsure if this is a good or a bad thing. On the plus side, I have the insulation and the energy available, which will help with endurance efforts & survival. On the other hand, its extra weight to carry around, which will slow me down, as well as being less aesthetically pleasing.

The Flag is coming along nicely. I've worked out a fantastic way to train it, and now all I need is to keep greasing the groove whenever I have an opportunity. A few issues with falling backwards, and I still need to kick into the motion, but its definitly coming.

The muscle up to handstand press is lagging. While I can nearly do a handstand press from a frog stand, thats a long way from an elbow leaver which is a long way from a bar. I'll keep plugging away at it, but it looks a little tight for 2 months. The muscle up section is a breeze though...general strength is coming along nicely. I got a few more jumps which were eluding me, though I haven't nearly found my physical and technical limits with those techniques - the mental blocks still remain my No. 1 impediment. I also redid my workout completely 2 weeks ago to include much more MN stuff; namely swimming, some gymnastics and some dedicated running times, which has taken up some gym time. The jack of all trades approach is hard, but has been rewarding so far.

Looking forward to the NatJam in a few months, Kapooka later in the year and then a possible 6 weeks (!) hiking in Tassie over Christmas.

Train hard.

Holiday

2008-07-13T03:59:00.000-07:00

I headed down south over the break to Wilsons Prom for a few days of bushwalking (and bushbashing, but more on that later). It was a good few days, and a little challenging as I went alone and unsupported to walk the more remote northern circuit, which involves some very basic navigation sections. My starting pack weight was about 36 kgs, finishing with about 31.

Day 1: Carpark to Five Mile Beach Camp (18 km) + Five Mile Beach (16 km)
I started walking that morning at about 9:30ish and had a mindless trip down the 4WD track, making it into five mile beach camp at about 2:00. After setting up camp I went for a walk/run (mostly walk) to the other end of the beach to check out the Cathedral, which is the name of the mountain that separates Five Mile beach and Sealers cove, and also the northern and southern circuits of the Prom. Crossing the top of it would allow one to do all the walks in the prom as one circuit, which would make for a nice 6 or so days. I decided it would be possible to make it through the bush over the top, but didn't end up testing this theory on this trip. Next time, and with people. Afterwards I headed backed to camp, racing the sunset back up the beach (it won), arriving a few minutes after sundown, and surprised how quickly the environment cools off at dusk. Live and learn. Then, cooked dinner by light of the headlamp (for the first and last time, brand new two days previous and as it refuses to turn on anymore...) and went to bed.

Day 2: Five Mile Beach Camp to Johnny Souey Cove (~5km)
I'd originally planned to make the grip from Five Mile to Tin Mine Cove, a journey of about 17.4 ks, but this plan was blown to hell by about nine thirty as due to a phenomenal lack of attention I had found myself about 3 or 4 ks further inland than I was supposed to be. I'd like to point out this trip was was not a difficult piece of navigation if one checks their bearings, knows the heading and path of the track (via map), and keeps an eye open for the flagging tape which marks some sections. I however, was paying no attention at all, and this plain fucking stupidity had me leave the track for an animal trail (they became remarkably similar at times.) By the time I had noticed, it was too late for backtracking, so I had a fun time quadrupedalling through the scrub in a general south-east direction for the beach, which was my only known landmark. After a few hundred meters of quadrupedal, I emerged into a beautiful landscape (was a bit too preoccupied to take photos though). On all sides, I was surrounded by ferns. I couldn't actually see the ground, and was trampling instead of generations of ferns. To the front and the side, generations of ferns had created towers about 2.5m tall, with live ones at the top and becoming progressively more decayed as they stretched into the ground. Trees had also grown, but the dirt around their roots had been progressively eroded, resulting in a mangrove-esque appearance which supported walls of ferns, creating a rainforest themed hedge maze about 15 m in diameter that went along the path of the river.

To begin with, it was just like moving through a ball pit, but for the last 800 or so meters the ferns were so thick and heavy that it was more like moving through a neck-high foam pit. In the end, I was able to leave the maze through a conviently placed boulder, and followed a much more human-sized trail parallel to the river until it emerged into the sea and Johnny Souey cove. In all, it was a nice succinct adventure which while not dangerous, had the potential to go very bad, as the wet ferns do a nice job of eliminating both sat phone reception above and obscuring the ground, increasing the chance of an immobilizing injury.

As it played out though, it was a nice crash course in navigation, and I won't be doing it again.

Day 3: Johnny Souey Cove to Tin Mine Cove (14.4 km)
I started the day in high spirits. It was a day of more difficult navigation than the previous, but paying attention helped immensely and apart from one little issue about 3ks from Tin Mine where I couldn't find the track for about half an hour, it was a good day. It rained lightly for most of the day, but obligingly stopped when I arrived at camp at about 2:00, and then obligingly started again (and a lot heavier) once I had my tent set up.

I had a remarkable experience here too - I found God- which is a rather rare experience for an atheist. There is literally no other way to describe the feeling, of being completely in touch with the rhythm of every raindrop, tree, scent, everything. On further reflection I came across the hypothesis that perhaps the Abrahamic concepts of God were supposed to be a conscious animation of this feeling; trying to inject a soul into the heartbeat of ones environment. This idea of a conscious puppeteer meant therefore a set of moral laws (no ability to reason results in no morals) appropriate to the time. It's more or less an academic argument that occurred to me, and might be interesting to theologians.

Day 4: Tin Mine Cove to Lower Barry Creek (~16 km)
Whilst advertised as the hardest day of the walk I'd actually rate this as the easiest, there were only about 3 contour lines for the day, and the scrub was only at a maximum of waist height. Though the track was required some searching in places, movement and vision were not restricted here like they were on the West Coast.

Day 5: Lower Barry Creek to Tidal River (~30 km)
This day was a pretty tough day physically. I covered the distance in about 8 hours, which had a lot of elevation gain. The first four or so ks were navigation, but after that I was back on the 4WD track from the first day, and was able to zone out again. The next 8 or 9 kilometers were on a dirt road, before the last few were all on bitumen, which meant by the end of the day though muscularly I was fine, my feet were aching from the repeated pounding, and struggled to fit into my boots again the next morning. Rain kept up steadily from when I got up till when I arrived, ten minutes before the shop closed - where I immediately OD'd on Maxibon . I'm pretty proud of my effort on this day, I was hefting about 32kgs + extra water (in case I didn't make it that day, and needed to make camp elsewhere) with a lot of elevation change, rain and mostly on one of the worst walking surfaces.

That was pretty much the trip. I took a few photos; if and when I can find a computer that takes camera cards I'll put up any nice ones.

Stupid

2008-06-12T18:16:00.000-07:00

Violence is a touchy, tabooed subject around most people I know. Most people I know describe violence as wrong, immoral, inhumane and stupid; and most of the time, it is those things. But by generalising, these same people put a value judgement on a concept. That is stupid because it cuts options. Now, a couple more assumptions...

Violence is applied across lots of different levels for lots of different purposes, with different intended (and actual) effects. In that last sentence I pointed out three independent variables, each of which has countless options. Violence is complicated.
Violence is, or has been, used by pretty much everybody (and will be for a considerable time yet).

Have you ever watched someone do something when they're really not prepared for it? You have; you see it when they don't understand the motion or the idea, and have to demonstrate or give a speech and they fumble, lose focus.

Say I get into a fight with someone, an otherwise civilised gent who loses his temper and goes physical. The engendered socialized side makes way for the inexperienced animal side, and what starts small can suddenly escalate if he gets a pen, I pull my keys and in the space of half a second we're both beyond where we initially were prepared to go psychologically.

That is when it's stupid. Stupid to start something without considering where it will end up. The guy who mugs you at knifepoint when he isn't prepared for the consequences (killing, dying, wounding, arrest, jail) is stupid. The guy who mugs you at knifepoint when he has considered risk vs. return may be an immoral heartless inhumane bastard, but he's much more likely to do it successfully and he's not stupid.

I know I'm not considering morality here. There are a few reasons for this, but only one will fit here: Not everyone is a moral being. Assuming that humans have a lower limit on how they depraved they can be is dangerous. By closing your mind; shutting your eyes and ears and saying it isn't so, you help hide the elephant in the room. It's important to acknowledge it's existence, even though the thought can make you sick in the stomach.

Ascetic

2008-06-04T22:36:00.001-07:00

...is a good word.

This has been a public service announcement.

Conception

2008-05-30T04:35:00.000-07:00

Haven't written much in a while. Haven't been really busy either, theres just been nothing to say.

Officer Selection Board for the army, they say I'd make a fantastic sergeant, but they'll take me as a lieutenant anyway.

A failed saut-de-bras and painful lesson in managing acute injuries. Ideas about movement and body coordination, practice and learning. A talk with Animal about pain, fear and confidence.

A class on predator dynamics, criminal mindset and legal concerns. A gathering of incredibly skilled martial artists (and me) screaming and charging and brawling and dealing with the pre and post-fight scenarios. Primitive thought, ferocity and zanshin. Good fun.

A bench and a dip station and 7ft precisions between them. Why not outside the gym? So many mental blocks... I'll get over them.

Jumping with your hips, keep your gut tight. Don't receive with your legs, lower your pelvis. It's like learning to walk again.

Looking forward to studying because you want to know, want to understand. The exam is irrelevant.

The confusion of relationships and the cacophony of feelings and realizing that so little of it matters because I am just so damn happy anyway.

The bliss of exhaustion, of collapsing and leaving a shadow of sweat behind. The joy of undiluted, hard pain. The drive of a tough challenge; and the delight of success or the lessons failure. How could anyone want to give it up?

"Screw it, it's game time."

2008-05-13T03:39:00.000-07:00

Here are the revisions for the workout. Rather than just listing the workout, I'm going to explain why I cut some things, why I added others, and the principles behind more of it. This will give you (on the off-chance anyone actually reads this blog) a better idea of what I'm training, and why.

Speed:
I'm going to speed up the time of the workouts, which means mostly decreasing rest time. This is largely due to time constraints on the rest of my life, and the fact that uni will be heating up next semester. Hopefully this will encourage my mitochondria to crank out the ATP faster. I'll post how it goes.

Warm up:
10 reps of a burpee-muscle up combo + dynamic stretching. This is because I've picked up a few injuries lately (nothing serious), because against my better judgment, I have refrained from doing much of a proper warmup. Anyway, its been costing me. I'm hoping this allows me to do a nice easy warmup of pretty much all the muscles in my body, without putting too much strain on any one of them.

Muscle ups: (3 x 10)
Now going to be done slow as possible, especially on the negatives. I don't have the beastly (read: blane) skill to do them matrix-style, so I'll work on the slow negatives. This should also have the added benefits of extra tendon and joint strength.

Lunges: (3 x distance)
Since I've found these hurt me more than most of the other exercises I do, I added more in on Monday/Friday.

Deadlifts: (3 x 6)
These are going to become a staple of my workout. To be honest, I don't know why they haven't been before, they increase lung capacity, leg strength, arm strength, core strength, all round sexiness, and they're pretty fun to do too. I might set some goals for these in the future, once I experiment a bit to determine what I can lift comfortably. Plus, due to the fact my legs are just generally weak, I'm going to be adding more exercises. My core has been letting me down too, so that needs work. Oh, and did I mention my arm strength?...Deadlifts do the lot, so it should help me lots.

Laches: (6 level pyramid)
I've kind of maxed out on these. 122 cm can be done comfortably, but to do so I have to tuck as tight as I can (not that tight, actually), and leave about 2 inches of clearance between my coccyx and the ground because the smith machine only goes so high. I'll be working on proper pyramids (just been doing halves) now.

Planche Progression: (60 seconds total. PB is a 15-18 second hold)
Moved to the end of the workout to take advantage of the fact I'm already buggered by this point.

Chippa pushups: (20 pushups, 10 second holds, 15 pushups)
Chippa pushups, named by me after the guy who first showed me them when I was down in Melbourne one time, is an exercise that involves pushups with holds in various positions. Will be extending the length of holds, and the number of reps.

Tabata thrusters: (20 on, 10 off; 15 reps per set)
Thrusters (its a Gym Jones thing; check them out if you haven't. Mark Twight articulates many things that I get tongue-tied over, or never got at all) are front squats to shoulder press. Pretty standard, but it seems like a good exercise to chain tabata-style, and since I stopped running, I think it might do some good for my cardio.

Hand & a half chins: (8 reps, 4 each arm)
A nice alliterated name for doing chinups, focusing the force on one arm for OACs. I'll keep knocking off digits until I can hopefully make the switch to an OAC. I'm doing this more than negatives because negatives put substantial stress on the joints (which is good...in moderation), and since I'm doing slow muscle ups and such, I'd like to minimize my chances of tendinitis.

Butterflies: (Dunno, likely 6-10 reps with heavy weights)
An exercise for iron-cross training I found on T-nation, more or less hand upside from a bar and flap your arms while holding dumbbells. When I say heavy weights, I'm probably looking at 6-10kgs. Its all relative :P.

Snatch & C&J: (Again, dunno. Likely more reps with low weight till I get the technique well enough to start safely training for strength)
I'm putting in some more olympic lifts because I've heard wonderful things. Dogen, Gym Jones and Jim Bathurst (of Beast Skills fame) all extol the virtues of them, so I'll put them in and see how they go. Another good reason to go to a gym boys and girls - you can get people to teach you these things properly.

Turkish Get-up:
Saw this on Gym Jones a while back and thought it looked good for your wrists. Hold a (long) barbell in one hand and get up off the ground, keeping the weight raised. Check their pictures if you want to see how its done proper.

Dumbbell swings:
Another fun full-body cardio exercise.

Looking at the next two months, its going to be difficult, but certainly achievable. I can hold a handstand on a bar well, though its a wobbly press getting there (I have been using those pushup bars in my room, 'in the field' it'll be totally different I imagine), I can do a full ROM HSPU on the bars in the morning, by the end of the day its 3/4 ROM. The 'hard' goal for this month is going to be the handstand press I imagine...once I have that down the actual way I'm going to pull off the muscle-up to handstand press will become much clearer.

Train hard.

Scared

2008-05-12T17:46:00.000-07:00

I had a profound experience this Saturday. It was at kung fu, and the teacher had brought in a friend of his from a riot police unit to teach us a little about violence. After a little anecdote, he put us in an 8ft square and set us on each other. 2 on 14.

At my kung fu, they’re an intelligent bunch of people. Most of them are university-educated, and we have a few physiotherapists and a pharmacist scattered among them. When in the 14, you developed a pack mentality against the duo. Working together in a loose group, knowing what your particular target was, what you had to do for the pack. Real hindbrain stuff. Scary how quickly you can turn a group of educated, ‘civilised’ men into savages.

I went into the centre for the last round. It was chaos. If my memory serves me well, which I doubt, I got barrelled into from the side, and separated from G. Smart move by the pack, because G has an amazing amount of talent, and separating me from him allowed him to be surrounded, and taken down more easily. (As it turned out, G spent his time making a retreat towards the door, using members of the pack as human shields against the rest of the bodies). I remember being barrelled into by four or five bodies, which would also make sense considering how many would be needed to control G, and I went backwards towards the wall, though I never made it. I remember having guys trying to do a takedown, and never quite getting there. I remember making the decision “I will not go to the ground;” and that was being the extent of my actions. I remember I didn’t fight off my attackers. I remember I didn’t keep my hands up, I remember my vision was blurred, focusing on the back of A’s head, not on the broader situation. I didn’t see another member of the pack slide up on my right side and drill five punches into the side of my head. Game Over.

It scared me how badly I was beaten. I don’t get beaten that often, but neither do most people anymore. There’s this concept, the Prochaska-Di Clemente cycle for behaviour change. We were taught that “it’s important to tell people that relapse is not failure, it’s an opportunity to try new ways to succeed.” Bullshit. You failed. Why do people never learn anymore? There’s no longer any incentive. The lowest grade in schools now is an E. Whatever we learn is enough. Without struggle it’s easy to fake integrity. Without consequence you can get away with anything.

It scared me how badly I was beaten. A thought on the train home was to not go back. That’s easily accomplished. My life would be happier if I didn’t try to explore and learn about violence, I would certainly be better at many other more ‘normal’ skills, able to integrate better with most people in society. But I could not be content, living a lie. Lie is a good word for it. Lie means to tell a falsehood, to engage in a deception. I would be knowingly basing my worldview on a set of premises that I knew were false. I cannot do that. Chiron said that “people who talk about enlightenment as if it were a joy instead of an understanding…always have soft hands.” Soft hands are nice to the touch, but they have no utility. Afterwards, my teacher said “you were a victim of your own inexperience.” It was a nice way to word it.

How much can you really know about yourself if you’ve never been in a fight?” - Tyler

May 9th

2008-05-09T04:07:00.001-07:00

2 month goals:
3 sets of 6 muscle ups: Completed...barely
The first set went off like a dream, perfect form, everything. Second set needed a kick on the last couple and a one-arm-at-a-time push on the last one, and third set needed it on the last 3 reps...last rep was an absolute killer. I was in a dead hang for a few seconds before hand and it was still a struggle to get all the way to the top. Rest between sets was about 4 minutes and 3:30.

Chins with 40kgs: Failed.
Probably should have been more specific with this. Also probably should have trained for it as well, but anyway. I got a rep of each, and that was about it. I'm gonna have another go; because it seemed to me to be much more the tiny weight belt with the bumper-plate weights, that I did it halfway through the workout, and that I'm dead tired much more than me being weak :P.

Gonna revise the workout on Sunday (getting bored), step up the HSPUs to 3 reps each time (8 reps needed in 2 months). Apart from that, still going strong.

Train hard.

Shit Humans Do

2008-05-05T23:45:00.000-07:00

I went home home for the first time in a long time this weekend. The air is cleaner there. Time passes slowly. A day at home working on a paper, and a day in the bush visiting some of my old parkour haunts, and did many things I've never done before - and got many cuts and bruises where I hadn't before. Practiced precisions, vaults, flicks, climbing. Practiced alternating speeds, changing direction and keeping eyes ahead while moving on uneven/rocky ground. Practiced sneaking up on tourists.

It was also a good time to think.

Thought about parkour, the independent individual nature of it in a dependent social world. "When you go all the way, you will be alone..." but how often are you alone anymore? (How often do you go all the way anymore?) Traceurs aim for a mastery of themselves, because they understand that's all they can control. But not even that... digestion, nerves, even cancer - are beyond conscious control; whilst good executives and politicians understand well how to control people. We do it everyday, from advice and complaints, to cues in body language and tone of voice. Is it a balance thing, between self and society? A traceur trains to be altruistic, but by being completely independent how can you help others? So do you divide your time between one and the other, one part to be strong, the other to be useful?

Are humans too complicated animals to be able to satisfy themselves with just one mastery?
Is the world too complicated to allow survival of specialists, or too strong to allow survival of generalists? Or maybe we are just drawing arbitrary lines to decide where walking becomes running becomes fighting becomes love-making becomes philosophy, and there are no real differences between them- its all just shit humans do.

I don't know.

Because although they're the same nerves and the same muscles, each has a different mindset and a different objective. I've been told many times that I can't have everything. I don't think I understand why yet. Maturity, I guess.

(NB: Don't you find it interesting how its always kids who have the best dreams? I remember when I was in year 1, and a teacher asked 'What do you want to be when you grow up?' Everyone said doctors ("Because I want to help people!" - I remember that) and astronauts and footy stars and now I see people my age with scars on their wrists flipping burgers or stacking shelves from 9-to-5 and I'm just...what happened?)

Content

2008-04-26T04:42:00.000-07:00

First set of six muscle ups, only had to do the one-arm-at-a-time on the last ascent. That said, I was doing them quite fast (no kick though), so I'm wondering if its more momentum than strength.
Broke focus on a speed vault, clipped my knee and got a nice bleed and swelling. Understand now what focus is - an articulate, relaxed, moment-to-moment awareness; as opposed to tense concentration.
Wore a bunny suit.
Beach house party. Interesting how completely the illusion of pleasantries collapse, and the truth stands out so clearly when people drink. Also interesting how much less fun it is to drink with acquaintances - rather than friends.
Saw an old friend at the station and smiled as she amazed at how much I'd grown.
Wing Tsun... every class feels like an ascent to a higher plane of being - so much learned about movement, structure, anatomy, people - and some about violence and emotion; so much learned, yet still being so far from competent.
Wandering around in the rain trying to remember where Happy Noodle is. Must pay more attention.
Read John Scalzi's Being Poor, and felt ashamed of every time I had ever complained.
Heavy trackies. Deep Heat. Good music. Glenfiddich 12. Paper and pen, and ideas manifest.

Indestructible

2008-04-22T03:12:00.000-07:00

Firstly some personal history. I started parkour two years ago, after being completely sedentary for the previous 16 years. Needless to say, I was...terrible, and after 6-9 months had 'progressed' to have roughly the same amount of skill as a non-parkour practitioner of my age. But, I did read a lot, did browse forums and articles and such, and knew the theory. Then I went to the gym for a year, and built some fundamental strength. I can honestly say that I progressed more technically in a year at the gym than I did in 6-9 months of practicing techniques, which would give you some idea of my level of coordination. Even so, my ability for spontaneous action remains poor, and I struggle with things I haven't drilled. That all said, I'm progressing faster than I feel I 'should' be, given the (little) amount of time I train each week. But, not complaining. Anyway, the point of this little biography is to explain that I don't think I have the experience to lend enough weight to what I'm going to say, so take it with a grain of salt - but take it, because I think it’s important. At least, it may give you something to think about.

"The final goal of physical education is to make strong beings." - Georges Hébert

"The goal of physical training can be summed up in one phrase, “to make yourself as indestructible as possible.” The harder a man is to kill, the longer he will remain effective, as a climber, a soldier, or whatever." - Mark Twight

If you disagree with either of those, then this article isn’t written for you. Plenty of people practice parkour just for fun, for fitness, or just to dabble – and I have no problem with that, but this article is an attempt to engage on a deeper level than just the motion.

Parkour is a mental and physical discipline for learning to overcome obstacles in your way, as if to move in a chase or emergency situation. It's about learning to move, to cross obstacles, to keep going. All well and good – it IS important - but there are many limitations on this kind of training. Even more if you consider the average traceurs training. Vaults, wallruns, probably conditioning, possibly stretching. Now, I'm all for training and I have much respect for the practitioners of this discipline, because it is physically and mentally challenging, and sticking with it requires tenacity, strength and dedication. So what's my issue here? I feel that while the training helps, it's incomplete. Being able to jump, vault and climb is all well and good, but if you have to leave your friends/family for the dogs to do so (and who would), then the skills remain unused - useless. The stock standard emergency is the fire, but while training helps you get out (or in, if your having the save-the-world, get-the-girl fantasy), it can't help you assist others to do so, and if your not strong enough to carry the girl out, completing whatever movements you need to, then again your skills are being inhibited. What about if your running, and you reach a river, but you can't swim. The obstacle beat you. What if your running, and you get caught? The obstacle (distance) beat you. Then the obstacle is the fire, the animal, the mugger; how will you overcome them? Bribery? Then the obstacle is money, which requires a source of income. Violence? Then the obstacle is firstly them, then the law, then possibly the prison, or possibly the psychological aftermath. Verbal de-escalation? How good at persuasion are you? And so on. This is not a criticism of parkour, parkour is not designed to teach conflict resolution or practical combatives. But to me, many traceurs who follow the discipline so they can be strong, be useful, handle themselves… are somehow limiting the overall scope of what they are doing, and the methods with which to accomplish it.

But I believe that Belle, Foucan, the Yamakasi - all the original French traceurs, would have no problem in the above situations. If you look at their videos, there are far fewer movements that fit the label of any one 'technique'. It's progressed beyond a concrete, articulate concept for them, the hours upon countless hours of movement has removed the constraints of technique. This feeling I think is in line with Blane's Dilution article, where people who end up very technically proficient end up shallower in other areas due to lack of experience. This feeling only applies to the way parkour is trained, not so much the discipline itself. But an art is only as good as its exponents, an art IS in fact its exponents, and if its exponents are lacking, the art suffers as a result.

I think Méthode Naturelle overcomes many of these flaws. Which is odd, you might think, because parkour evolved from MN, so surely it’s an improvement? Yes, and no. It’s more focused technically, but less generally applicable. I think that the original practitioners spent their early years training MN, and developed skills and qualities which the second generation (including myself) I feel lacks; before they began to gravitate towards movement, and less towards a martial development – due to their environment, resources, and the type of person that they became in the banlieue. MN builds strength, teaches force of will and character; and develops the qualities you need to overcome obstacles. Nothing specific, but just obstacles. And hence, this lack of specificity comes a full circle, back to parkour, martial arts, communication skills. The MN teaches, I think, intent. I don’t mean intent as “Be Strong,” (which it does), I mean intent as a more momentary idea, “Go forward,” “Dive right,” “Hit the bastard.” With intent, I believe then the subtleties of technique can be applied more naturally. Have you ever noticed when your perfectly in the zone, that things just ‘happen?’ If the “go forward” idea is always in your mind, and you have a good understanding of your body, then your body just…moves.

Of course, running towards something always means your running away from something else. The idea that training one area may weaken another area is perfectly valid – though there is a synergy between many skills, there is never a complete overlap. There is quite a famous quote, that you’ve probably heard tossed about quite regularly; “Jack of all trades, master of none.” It’s a fair point, but the full quotation actually reads; “Jack of all trades, master of none; but oftentimes better than a master of one.”

"Etre dans le vrai."

Narcissism

2008-04-14T05:26:00.001-07:00

Jumped on the electric scales at the gym today:
Total Body Water: 65.1%
Daily Dietary Requirement: 8771 kJ (2096 kcal)
Metabolic Age: 12 (No idea what this means)
Body fat: 5.2 kg
Body fat percentage: 6.7%

Best of all; today I got the first two sets 4 muscle ups like a breeze...the 2 assisted ones easily. Only in the last set was I struggling, couldn't get the 4th one so I had to relegate myself to 3 assists. Still very good though. Seem to be on track for a set of 6 by the end of the month (May 10).

Not a bad day at all.

Rollouts

2008-04-10T04:38:00.000-07:00

Failed.

I can do the extension, and can hold it, but can't roll back out again. If that doesn't make sense, its because I'm using dumbbells instead of a wheel, so I get/have to stagger the movement, which allows me to stall it at certain places. I didn't put the effort in though, so I deserved it.

22 Hours

2008-04-08T03:26:00.000-07:00

It's been a nice last few days.

Wing Tsun Saturday; always learning loads and always feeling inadequate.

Parkour Sunday, with the satisfaction of learning protection without the thought of psychological/legal consequences.

Finally got dragged down by a cold Sunday night (still feel weak...twice in a year is a terrible infraction), and slept. A lot. 22 hours in the last 48. Thought about practicality, and similarities (and differences) between training and the task, what about workouts that chain or circuit exercises in a similar way to how they're completed outside the gym (e.g. if you can't do muscle ups, perhaps chaining chinup-dip is a helpful way of practicing top-outs on a climbup), slow compound exercises that don't utilise momentum, but work muscle groups that are often used together. Why not do squats-to-upright row, slowly on medicine balls? Its training shoulder and leg groups at the same time, which are often utilised together. Why not make physical workouts the same duration as the task your training for, or twice as long, and then do them in half the time? I've trained exclusively strength for the past year or so, and I know that I can do the first few reps, very very well. After that, form and technique begin to suffer. I think the gym is a great tool, but is both over and underestimated in what it can achieve; overestimated, because people (like me) spend too much time there, and not enough on technique, and underestimated; because people don't explore how structure and time management and options can improve so many other, 'non-gym-trainable' (its a word, I swear) qualities, like coordination and spirit. There's a preconception that the gym is for narcissists, biceps curls, and 3 sets of 10; as opposed to an anvil to forge yourself as you see fit.

Control

2008-03-31T03:19:00.000-07:00

It was a good day today.

Still sore from yesterday, I got a sets of 4, 3, 3 muscle ups, landed the laches on the fingertips so very quietly and absolutely pounded out the last few exercises so I could get to dinner. Pretty much exceeded expectations all round, which is good.

But the thing that made it unique was I met another guy there who was actually working, trading sweat for functionality, and not just aesthetics. He was a surfer, an old surfer, and he knew what he was doing. As soon as he said to me, "We need more nutcases in the gyms," I knew I'd met a kindred spirit. He worked a lot on swiss balls and medicine balls; doing squats, spins, pushups, side-plank switches... endless combinations that required an amazing sense of balance and control. It's funny, but at the time I wrote clarity, I chose that name because I liked the word, not because I had any actual clarity about what I was doing, and it seems I've found something to focus on now - improving balance and control will make a fundamental difference to parkour, both in balance and in terms of power generation, it will work my core hard during the gym, which will assist with handstands, handstand presses and the end goal of the muscle-up to handstand-press. I won't go so far to say that I was being prophetic when I called the workout "Clarity", but it's a nice thought. (Also, if anyone is wondering; I'm using one-word titles in a mostly ineffectual attempt to expand my vocabulary, although it seems to me that most of the words I'm using are irrelevant to the topic at hand. Ah well.)

So, when I have time, I shall go through Clarity and revamp it with some new things I've picked up in the last few weeks, some more exercises from parkour conditioning classes (for Wednesdays I think...), and from my new nutcase friend. I've also been thinking at having a go at an iron cross as my next major six month goal, or maybe a one arm chinup... a lot of this excess strength is redundant in terms of efficacy, but hell, I enjoy it.

Sore, sleepy, exhausted and with plenty to think about. It was a fucking good day today.

Chaos

2008-03-29T18:16:00.000-07:00

I love the word chaos. I love the idea of it, the total lack of control or order - or more accurately any that we, as humans, recognise. The sleet that flies horizontally into your face as you battle up a mountain is in perfect order with itself, with the weather patterns that generated it weeks and months before, but to us...it came out of nowhere.

I was told that the goal of a paramedic is to get "The right response to the right person in the right timeframe, with the right decisions made in initial care... and do it better next time." That's perfection. But its a goal, not the standard. Perfection stops when the tyre blows, or the rush hour jam holds up the MICA, or the patient just...dies. In each second here there's a choice, made on the best way to reverse or delay entropy until more resources can be brought to bear, and each choice has its own pro's and con, there is rarely a perfect decision; just one that works well enough to keep the patient alive long enough to get them to the ER. And being strong, having experience, sound judgement, knowing when to relax and when to tense, when to act and when to wait - all help a little, all help to exercise control over a situation. So when the sleet is barrelling into your face, you can dispassionately way up the pros and cons of each choice and pick one. You can't control the rain, but your own actions will determine how it affects you, and then it's just part of the scenery. I don't think its possible to fully understand and predict the chaos of the world, but I'd like to be able to get my abilities to a point where I feel comfortable in chaos. An eye in the storm.

Suffering

2008-03-18T23:57:00.000-07:00

Suffering is important. Pain is important. When I say I enjoy it, I don't mean that I enjoy self-harm or mutilation... Pain is not the end, pain is the means to an end. Withstanding suffering increases your capacity to suffer; it is about being strong, not about being a masochist. It's intensely difficult for me to articulate, so I quote:

“I think a lot about my friends, my family, myself. I often wonder why I put myself in these situations : I'm cold, I'm dirty, I'm tired, although I could be enjoying the comfort of my sweet home... I don't really have an answer. Sometimes I feel like a child who has put on a suit too big for him, I don't really know if I should be here doing this, but in moments like now, when I reach a goal, when I win my challenge, I feel like I grow a little bit into this suit.” - Thomas Couetdic

Diamonds are made from ordinary rocks, put under extreme pressure.

Survival

2008-03-18T15:50:00.000-07:00

Survival is one of my principles. Survival of myself, my faculties, my friends, my ideas, my beliefs. See a pattern here? It is all about me; which is fine in some ways, the concepts of self and autonomy and determination are important to me - but it is also a very selfish way of subsisting. Be Strong to Be Useful, as opposed to just Being Strong.

Humans are social animals, and we evolve (and survive!) through social interactions. C.S. Lewis said that "friendship has no survival value. But it adds value to survival." That's true in a way, but so false in many others - humans came together into tribes because the life-expectancy of each member of the group was higher than an individual on their own. And though that contributed to the survival of the species, fulfilling Darwin's theory of natural selection was not the goal, survival of the self was the goal, you cared for the fallen member because a) If they recovered, they added to your survival, and b) If you did it for them, then they should do it for you - both "altruistic" reasons were founded on the philosophy of Saving Your Own Ass.

Again, pretty selfish. And again, there's nothing wrong with that. And maybe that's where it's supposed to stop, and young wet-behind-the-ears idealists like me maintain romantic (and arbitrary) concepts like honour and loyalty. But I think chivalry is important. I think that survival is a base instinct, but humans are capable of so much more than mere survival - look at art, and music, and literature - these things have no survival value, but most definitely add value to survival.

Sun Tzu said that "A great general is not one who wins, but who excels at winning with ease." I find people should existence beyond just surviving, and into prosperity* - where their efforts have produced things that add value to survival. It is obviously a matter of degrees, about how high one chooses to climb - and about what society chooses to value, but in my case, I want to excel at surviving. That, however, sounds like an oxymoron, so I'll rephrase: "To Be and To Last." Or, in the original French; Etre et Durer.

*n. Flourishing condition, thriving condition, success

Clarity

2008-03-17T17:12:00.000-07:00

These are the workouts I have devised so far for the following while, to complete the following goals. In addition, whenever I leave my room, I need to do 6 Psedo-Planche Pushups and 2 HSPUs, this is because my shoulders (one of my weakest muscle groups) get too exhausted during normal workouts do be able to build in both these exercises, so I do them outside of my normal gym sessions:

Goals:
1 month:
Full rollouts

2 month:
3 sets 6 muscle ups

4 month:
Full handstand press & 8 reps HSPU & Freestanding HSPUs & Tucked Flag

6 month:
Muscle up to handstand press, Chinups & Dips with 40kgs, Full Flag

Workout 1:
Reps and sets will evolve each week.

Monday/Friday:

Exercise	Reps	Sets	Break
Su Nim Tao Chum Kiu
Muscle Ups	4s, 2a	3	2:30
Planche Progression	60s total	-	-
Ladders	4	3	2:30
Headstands	30s	3	30s
Dips	10	3	2:30
Laches	Max Pyramic	3	2:00
Barbell Pullovers	10	3	Circuit
Lat Shoulder Raises	10	3	Circuit
Rollouts	10	3	Circuit
Quadrupedal Movement	1 fwd, 1 bck	3	2:00
Pushups	40+	1	-

Tuesday:
PNF Stretching (5-7, off, 5-7, off, 30.)
Achilles
Bed – Hamstrings
Butterfly Stretch:
Sitting Hamstrings:
Quadriceps
Glutes:
Sitting Side Bends
Abdominals
Pectorals
Grounded Shoulders
Wrists
Trapezius

Su Nim Tao
Chum Kiu

Wednesday:

Exercise	Reps	Sets	Break
Su Nim Tao Chum Kiu
HSPUs	6	3	2:30
Planche Progression	60s tot	-	-
Man-makers	6	3	2:30
Chins	10	3	2:30
Dips	10	3	2:30
Weighted Punches	30s	4	1:00
Pushups	40+	1	-

Thursday:
PNF Stretching (5-7, off, 5-7, off, 30.)
Achilles
Bed – Hamstrings
Butterfly Stretch:
Sitting Hamstrings:
Quadriceps
Glutes:
Sitting Side Bends
Abdominals
Pectorals
Grounded Shoulders
Wrists
Trapezius

Exercise	Reps	Sets	Break
Su Nim Tao Chum Kiu
Weighted Lunges	12	3	2:30
Back Squats	8	3	2:30
Deadlifts (BW)	8	3	2:30
Depth Squats	6	3	2:30
Pushups	40+	1	-

Workout 2: Redemption
Redemption is a workout that occurs whenever I fail something. It is full of my least favourite exercises. No breaks.

Redemption
Quadrupedal Movement: 20m
Plank: 1:00
Squats: 50
Quadrupedal Movement: 40m
Plank: 2:00
Squats 75
Quadrupedal Movement: 60m
Plank: 3:00
Squats: 100
Quadrupedal Movement: 40m
Plank: 2:00
Squats 75
Quadrupedal Movement: 20m
Plank: 1:00
Squats: 50

Merit

2008-03-12T23:22:00.000-07:00

In Apology, Socrates remarks "I am wiser than this man, for neither of us appears to know anything great and good; but he fancies he knows something, although he knows nothing; whereas I, as I do not know anything, so I do not fancy I do." There's two things I'd like to bring this too: Firstly, if you did not put the above through any scrutiny because Socrates said it, I'd like to point out to you that in Phaedo, he 'proves' the existence of ghosts. Socrates may have been a brilliant philosopher, but that doesn't mean he was right. Aristotle was a great scientist, but we are reasonably certain now that the world isn't an amalgamation of five elements. Hippocrates founded medical thought, but stated in the oath that "I will impart a knowledge of the Art to my own sons and those of my teachers, and to disciples bound by a stipulation and oath according to the law of medicine, but to none others." Its been two thousand years since then, and we've moved on. Maybe.

Its been only relatively recently that medicine has no longer become entirely a privilege of the upper class of society, and even then it still remains a degree that can be, more or less, bought. But, there are now other "streams" of entry available. Rural and indigenous students can enter medicine - and university - with lower academic requirements.

And, naturally, the city folk complained of discrimination, the rich ones bought country houses to give themselves rural addresses, and I mused at the fact that if I lived across the road I would be 'rurally disadvantaged.'

And yeah, it is discrimination. And no, I don't think that's a bad thing. Discrimination is important with dealing with groups of people. How else can you discriminate between them? If an aboriginal person does badly on the academic entry requirements, does it mean they're stupid, or does it mean they spent their childhood learning to hunt and forage, and not their times tables? They may have the sharpest eyes in the world, could spot minuscule fibroids on the liver, read MRI's flawlessly, but because these skills aren't assessed in an exam, they can't gain entry. It's because those particular skills have deemed to be meritorious by society. It used to be your parentage and your gender that determined your 'merit.' Now that it is intelligence based, a large proportion of the course is female. And when they enter the research arena, research will change...science and knowledge itself will change because the cultural bias through which it is researched will change, and we will find gaping moral holes in today's society because of it. Two thousand years ago, slavery was law. Forty-six years ago we gave Aboriginals the vote. Ten years ago we sterilised people with disabilities without their consent. Yesterday?

There's always a long way to go.

Assumptions

2008-03-08T13:28:00.000-08:00

I'd like to talk about violence, about parkour, and movement, and stealth, and survival - but there are others out there who do it so much better than me. Chiron, Blane, Erwan - their thoughts - unlike most - are backed by experience - so I'll shut up and listen and one day I'll write too about the foundations of whatever concept that I follow down to its core. But now, I'm going to write about philosophy - something I do know a little something about - and later on, I'll write down what violence and parkour mean to me - not what they mean (an important distinction). But first, some ground rules.

1. The issue of life being of divine origin is irrelevant. There are saintly characters in all religions - and outside of them. God is unnecessary to living a happy and productive life.

2. People can change. From personal experience, I believe this is so. It can be hard, nigh on impossible, but people can change.

3. The meaning of life is arbitrary. There are so many different theories about the meaning of life that I think this is self-evident.

4. If the meaning of life is arbitrary, then so is everything done in life. This is leaning awfully close to the existentialist philosophy of "No action is inherently better than any other action," except I found that idea to be quite depressing - and rather impractical. I believe some actions are inherently better than others...because I believe they are.

5. What I believe, and what I do, is determined by a set of principles. Principles are arbitrary too, in a way, they are merely things that I have chosen to hold close to my heart, and you will have different ones than I do. The best analogy I can think of is mathematics: numbers are the universe, and functions (plus, minus, etc) are the principles - don't break them, and everything just falls into place, step by step. Difficult tasks become easier if they advance these principles, feelings such as regret and guilt and sadness become redundant.

I'd like to say I know how I came across these principles, and give you a 5-step plan for articulating your own, but I don't. But try to get to the core of yourself; write down everything that matters to you and look for patterns. Find people with qualities you want, and imitate them. The rest just comes down to how much you want it.

Standards

2008-03-05T02:11:00.000-08:00

It's interesting how your standards change over time as you condition to a particular lifestyle. As I've grown into the idea of being strong (and refined that philosophy, something I will present shortly and then continue to poke at as I integrate parkour, violence and medicine more effectively in my lifestyle) over the past few years, changes have occured in my psyche to reflect this attitude.

There are no longer good days, ordinary days, and bad days; there are normal days, and bad days. Pretty much all days are good. Lack of intensity is a rarity - and comes hand in hand with periods of self-loathing, making it even more undesirable. The clock now times how long till the gym closes, not till I can leave.

The work is interesting, enjoyable and important, and gets done as a matter of course. Work, I think, is like eating and drinking; it must be done - and enjoyable if done in the right mindset.

By enjoying everything I do, it seems my life is ultimatly calm, effortless, and stress-free. Its been a long time since I've ever had to do something to 'relax.' Everything has a purpose beyond being fun. My only upset is that when I sleep; I am not utterly exhausted.

But I guess you can't have everything.

Musings

2008-03-03T02:52:00.000-08:00

Depression is an interesting thing.

At 15, I was happy. Don't they say ignorance is bliss? Never failing is easily accomplised by never trying.

At 16, I tried. It's hard at first, but you get used to it. You get over the hump, and its wonderful. Success & failure, in the right doses, are a grand medicine.

At 17, I'm addicted. That was the high. Intensity in all things. That was the high. I guess now is the crash. Its a deep, deep sadness, but I know it will come to pass, which makes this - and anything bearable. It's not that my life is worthless, it's the exact opposite. I'm squandering opportunity.

For example: It's o-week now at Uni - first year - and the college is going off (I realise that sudden change could be a factor in my altered mindset, but I've done it before, and I don't get attached to things like that. Lack of Anna, Patrick & Gervis are much more likely causes - but I don't get attached to people much either, so still, I doubt it.) and its been fun. Partying is fun. Parkour is better. Pain is better. Taking yourself to the very edge of your limits, pushing through the dark makes the morning all the more beautiful. I know. I have pictures. The people on my floor are fantastic, and the days have been fantastic with them.

The nights less so. They're all alcoholics. And there's nothing wrong with that. People make choices - for good or bad reasons, with good or bad effects - but the act of choosing validates the result. But there is a culture here, a lowest common denominator attitude. Study to pass exams, not study to know. In the career that we are preparing for... I don't think that is good enough. The bare minimum is seen to be enough. I don't want to be scraping by with the bare minimum, I want to know. Again though, this is just choice. There is nothing wrong (inherently...I believe otherwise) with being the lowest common denominator - otherwise it would be higher. So the bare minimum is enough, its just not my choice. So by choosing more, I choose to be sad now, sad at how this week - though fun, was the post unproductive since I first tried. But I don't want to be sad, so I will need to make a choice - cure or amputate. To amputate, I need to return to the 15 year old level of thinking, stop trying, lower my standards, and I'll be good enough.

That's fucking anathema to me.

On the holidays, I threw my intensity - my year 12 gym and study intensity - onto a flywheel, stopped gym, stopped study, and ran. I ran a lot. Now I need to transfer it back to the things that matter. The things that I choose to matter.

Medicine? It may save my life one day. It will certainly save someone elses. It matters.
Wing Chun? Parkour? Being strong is all well and good, but if you can't use it, you're useless. Use-less; without use. It matters.
And friends, family, and all those who push me to adapt, overcome, improvise and grow strong? They matter.

But drinking; and partying?
They matter; they matter to many - those who live for the weekend - but I always found the week so much more exhilerating. It dosn't matter. I don't matter, the people passing my door in drunken revelry at 2 A.M. don't matter - and neither would any feeling of annoyance - so deep somewhere in my head all I hear is silence. So I guess I'm doing alright.

Looking back on when I wrote this; I'd like to say that this kind of clarity is rare for me. But its always welcome.